What do you guys think of Jay-Z's recent announcement?
Jay-Z has vowed to never use derogatory terms for women in his music again following the birth of his daughter, Blue Ivy Carter.
The rapper, who welcomed his first child with wife Beyoncé last weekend, has stated in a poem to celebrate the birth of baby Blue Ivy that he will drop the use of 'b*tch' - revealing that his degradation of women in his songs "has passed."
"Before I got in the game, made a change, and got rich/ I didn't think hard about using the word b*tch/ I rapped, I flipped it, I sold it, I lived it/ Now with my daughter in this world I curse those that give it. I never realized while on the fast track that I’d give riddance to the word bitch, to leave her innocence in tact."
The hip-hop icon continued:
"No man will degrade her, or call her name. I'm so focused on your future, the degradation has passed. I wish you wealth, health and insight. Forever young you may pass. Blue Ivy Carter, my angel."
I personally think of this as a start, but only that. He still has a lot of work to do. We see this with men a lot. They have a daughter and all of a sudden they don't like to see women degraded. There are two problems I see with this immediately.
One: Didn't his wife count as a woman who shouldn't be degraded? Or wasn't she "innocent" enough? He seemed to think it was all right for "non-innocent" women to be degraded.
And OK fine, it is good that he can see it from a different perspective now that he has a daughter and maybe he will extend this feeling to all women. I hope so. I hope he can continue to learn.
But the second problem is that it is still about HIM. It took him personally experiencing the feeling of "this is too close to me now and I don't want it to happen" in order for him to change.
Or as another anonymous commenter said on this blog,
I don't understand, Why does something dramatic have to happen in someone's life before they decide "Oh, yeah I gotta stop being this way because I don't want some one to mess with mine in the future."
Men should respect women not because the disrespect upsets men, but because it oppresses women. At least that is what I believe in cases like that.
However I still want to say that it is a good start and in my own opinion, if he continues to learn more about oppression and misogyny, then maybe he will come to realize this. I have hope.
We didn't hear a word like this from Gerard Way, Lindsey Way, or Frank Iero when they had daughters. Not one of them came forward and said "I never thought about how women were treated until I had a daughter, now I think I'll stop degrading them." So also in my opinion, Jay-Z is way ahead of them. MSI and MCR are still in the dark ages.
Also, I wish all of you a happy and healthy new year and the best of luck in 2012.
1,252 comments:
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Kapunua, I have to ask. Why do some anons come on here and attack you so harshly? What's up with all the hate? I find it quite disturbing.
“Love me or hate me, both are in my favor…If you love me, I'll always be in your heart…If you hate me, I'll always be in your mind.”
Well, shoot. What's up with the 200 comments thing here? I guess I'll have to bookmark this page. :/
j
?
WTF is going on with Blogger all of a sudden? I couldn't get onto this page, there was no "newer" clicky. Well, that's different.
10:59, I have absolutely no idea. I'm constantly just boggling about that myself.
b
I remember a comment made a long time ago by an anon who was trying to explain that people such as rockstars and other people in the entertainment industry don't come to blogs and develop 'friendships' with people outside the industry. If these people could comprehend that point, I think many of the attacks on Kapunua would cease.
I don't understand how a person can tell some 'fans' a 'secret', perhaps second pregnancy? and not expect it to go viral on the web.
Who cares 3:28?
Kapunua I wanted to ask you, have you seen The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (American version) and if you have, what did you think of it?
Lindsey is pregnant again?
x
I doubt that Lindsey is pregnant again, especially since MSI is going out on tour again. Not that it's really anyone's business and not that I really care, cuz I don't. I just hate it when fans start stupid rumors.
people such as rockstars and other people in the entertainment industry don't come to blogs and develop 'friendships' with people outside the industry. If these people could comprehend that point, I think many of the attacks on Kapunua would cease.
Totally agree with you there. I think the crazies who attack Kapunua were mad at her because she seemed to always get the attention of that faker who shall not be named. They thought if they could get rid of her, then he/she would pay them attention. That whole situation was just so fucking stupid.
Am I the only one who can see 15 comments missing?
I doubt that Lindsey is pregnant again, especially since MSI is going out on tour again. Not that it's really anyone's business and not that I really care, cuz I don't. I just hate it when fans start stupid rumors
She could be, they could replace her with another bassist like they did the first time.
How many comments do you see 10:49?
Verita, can you fix the comment problem?
11:23, there are only 200 comments but it says there are 219. It's so weird. I can only see the others if I leave a comment.
seems like lynz is gonna spawn again
and she did tour on the early days of her last pregnancy
Honestly, I could not care less about whether or not those two spawn again.
m
This comment thing is stupid!
,
Impressive performance by Madonna at the super bowl! Liked MIA and Nicki Minja too!
Totally agree with you there. I think the crazies who attack Kapunua were mad at her because she seemed to always get the attention of that faker who shall not be named.
I don't think they're crazy, I think they are people that really want to believe something. They're adults and can make their own choices as to want they want to think or believe, though I sort of feel for them, because I think so much energy is going into something that is essentially a dead-end and they could miss other opportunities for themselves.
Has anybody here seen the film A Dangerous Method by David Cronenberg? It's yet to be released where I am and I just wanted someone's opinion about it. I know that Michael Fassbender plays Carl Jung in the movie, alongside Kiera Knightley, Vincent Cassel and Viggo Mortensen playing Sigmund Freud.
I want to see that movie. I'm not a fan of Keira, but I've heard good things about Fassbender. I watched him in Eden Lake and thought he did well. Viggo Mortenson is a good actor too.
As for the LynZ being pregnant rumours, I'm going to assume this was cooked up by bored fans. She's been "pregnant" many times before and it turned out to be untrue.
I'm not too familiar with the works of David Cronenberg but I had to see Crash after reading JG Ballard's book and thought that was interesting, so this movie caught my attention with the class of actors in it.
I like Viggo too. And Vincent Cassel, he is a very underrated actor in my opinion.
I think Gary Oldman is an extremely underrated actor in Hollywood. He's up for an Oscar, I hope he wins. He deserves some recognition for his work.
b
A nonnie asked about Girl WIth The Dragon Tattoo. I haven't seen the American one, actually. I was going to, but then the more I thought about it, the more I started to fear that they were going to turn it into some kind of sexist thing. It's no spoiler that a big part of the story is about rape. So in the book and in the original movie, they gave equal "screen time" as it were, to both the original rape scene and to the revenge scene. I had a very bad feeling that they were going to tone down the revenge scene for american audiences, who are pretty much okay with watching a woman get raped, but would run screaming if they had to watch her raping him back.
A good friend of mine saw the American story but didn't read the book, and I asked him how that scene came across. He was like, "Yeah, they showed the scene with her, but basically cut away when it was happening to him. You got the idea of what was going on, but that was it."
That made me so damn mad, I decided I couldn't watch it.
In my opinion if they had depicted that scene in terms of the book there would have been a lot of negative publicity and I suppose if it's a big budget movie with a prominent director they would want some controversy but not so much that it turns the mainstream off. I also think there are different cultural attitudes, which vary greatly between Europe and America.
I've seen both versions of TGWTDT, and I liked both about equally. I don't think they whitewashed over the revenge scene in the American version at all. You totally knew what she was doing to him. Also, there was that awesome scene in the elevator where Lisbeth told that scumbag to "stop looking at tattoo removal sites". I loved that.
I thought Rooney Mara was very good in the role, and I didn't think they objectified her at all. I expected they would because of the way the film was advertised, but it was a big budget film after all, and they wanted to attract men as well as women. I think if men came into that film expecting it to be sexy, they got a surprise, and maybe even one that might teach them something. One can only hope.
g
I didn't like the advertising either. They made her look like an object, always clinging to him.
I mean, even the book was problematic, too. I think it's great that it was called "Men Who Hate Women" and that it addressed things like how rape is systematic and often overlooked, and most especially rape culture and the whole "asking for it / lifestyle" thing. It did address those.
But on the other hand, it was such a male-hero / author-fantasy / self-insert that it was eye-rolly sometimes. Like, Lisbeth is such a waif and society hates her and degrades her, but really all she needs is a man to understand her and love her for who she is to get her story rolling. You know?
Which isn't to say I didn't enjoy the books, because for the most part I did, and I think that they did at least a part of what they set out to do.
interesting
Kapunua have you ever been on Pinterest?
I wonder why Jessicka is still supporting a racist.
I wonder why you still wonder 7.22 This is old news and yet it just keeps coming back. Why? I don't know, its not even interesting.
I wonder why Jessicka is still supporting a racist.
I wonder why you still wonder 7.22. This is old news and it keeps coming back. Why? I don't know. Its not even interesting.
I thought this blog couldn't have been quiet for 3 whole days. Silly comments are broken.
Okay, I've seen it all now. Forget about planking the new viral rave is lionkinging. Lol.
MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE GUITARIST: ‘THE EMO TAG DOESN’T BOTHER US AS MUCH AS IT DID IN THE PAST’
With their theatrical stage shows and neo-goth appearance, My Chemical Romance went from the East coast underground scene to the vanguard of alternative rock in the 2000s. From the get-go, the band took on the “emo” label, but guitarist Ray Toro says that wasn’t in the plan.
“The emo tag doesn’t really bother us as much as it did in the past,” Toro told TheMusic.com. “As we’ve developed as a band that charge has really gone away to the point where it only creeps up now and then. I think what was really frustrating though was that the tag itself was really indefinable – we kept getting called something that to us made no sense whatsoever… “
http://audioinkradio.com/2012/02/my-chemical-romance-guitarist-ray-toro-emo-label/
My Chemical Romance building studio
06.02.2012 | THOMMO | 0 COMMENTS
As part of preparing for their impending fifth studio album, My Chemical Romance have decided on building their own recording space.
"Back in L.A. we just got a studio so we’re kind of building that out and basically trying to make a compound where we can be creative and be there whenever we want to be,” guitarist Ray Toro told Noise11.com.
http://www.killyourstereo.com/news/12626/my-chemical-romance-building-studio/
I've seen both versions of TGWTDT, and I liked both about equally. I don't think they whitewashed over the revenge scene in the American version at all. You totally knew what she was doing to him. Also, there was that awesome scene in the elevator where Lisbeth told that scumbag to "stop looking at tattoo removal sites". I loved that.
I thought Rooney Mara was very good in the role, and I didn't think they objectified her at all. I expected they would because of the way the film was advertised, but it was a big budget film after all, and they wanted to attract men as well as women. I think if men came into that film expecting it to be sexy, they got a surprise, and maybe even one that might teach them something. One can only hope.
Perhaps, but they're different movies made for different audiences imo. The initial version was more "arthouse" and the American version, catering to a mass market.
.
While I agree that neithr the books, nor either film was perfect, I applaud the fact that there was a major motion picture made that depicted a strong woman who refused to just be a victim of sexual abuse.
I can excuse the marketing of the film, as long as the film itself did not portray Lisbeth as a typical damsel in distress victim. I loved that she seemed so tiny and vulnerable, yet she was strong, brilliant, and capable of kicking ass. I also liked that she was the one who ultimately saved Blomkvist too.
What matters to me is that this was a major leap for women in films. It wasn't perfect, but nothing is. I damn well was going to support it.
*neither
g
MCR are building their own studio? Who's paying for it? Warner?
Who cares?
It will be interesting to see Vincent Natali's interpretation of Molly Millions. I just don't see the movie doing any justice to the book, but I'm trying to keep an open mind.
If you want to build your own studio you have pay for it.
n
I loved that she (Rooney Mara as Lisbeth) seemed so tiny and vulnerable, yet she was strong, brilliant, and capable of kicking ass.
This! As much as I liked Noomi Rapace in the role, Rooney Mara was more what I had in mind in the novel. Her slight frame and expressive face made those awful scenes where she was being abused by her guardian so much more painful to watch. It was so great to see the tiny little girl get revenge on that big, slimy old bastard!
d
I'm slightly dreading Neuromancer, because Molly is one of my all-time favorite characters. I really like the way William Gibson writes women, because he doesn't write them as women, just as characters. I always side-eye anything that's mass marketed to the dudebros of America.
That said, I really liked Haywire.
I do think we as women should try and support films that portray strong female characters, because the only way that kind of film is going to get made is if it makes money. It sucks, but $$$ talk.
I really like the way William Gibson writes women, because he doesn't write them as women, just as characters.
Agreed. I long for the day when that's the norm rather than the exception.
I always side-eye anything that's mass marketed to the dudebros of America.
My biggest fear is that the landscape in Neuromancer will be lost in it's translation, as some of the themes contained in the book are quite complex, and it will be just another forgettable sf/action movie.
Come to think about it, Neuromancer explores the same themes as TGWADT does: trust and betrayal.
I think Idoru would have made an entertaining movie.
Testing Testing 1,2,3
j
Molly made a great sex doll.
in the age of affordable beauty
Bitch, bitch, bitch…I think you oughta take advantage of my unnatural state
idealized holographic vaginas on their wrists, wet pink glittering under the harsh lighting
Gibson doesn't use women as sex objects at all. /sarcasm
Then the torso formed as Riviera caressed it into being, white, headless, and perfect, sheened with the faintest gloss of sweat
Such a powerful statement on behalf of women. All I could think of when I read that was Ken fucking a headless, mindless barbie doll. All the woman was there for was the sex act. All that was needed was the woman's body. Riviera didn't even need lips to kiss. Just the rest of her body to do whatever he wanted to do.
s
Which is exactly the point. But if you're an MSI or MCR fan who thinks that a guy calling women "bitches and whores" and making fun of rape victims is okay, you're obviously not going to be able to understand when an actual writer is using a scenario or creating an entire world to make a point about why it's unhealthy to objectify women.
You didn't even read the books, which is LOL.
I did read the books. William Gibson writes women as sex objects. Just because he wrote Molly as a woman who can kick ass in leather doesn't mean he and his books did any favors to the feminist movement.
Does a strong woman need to dress in tight leather and boots to kick ass? I don't think so.
I like Gibson's books but he does no favor to women or the feminist movement.
How many women in Neuromancer aren't hookers? 1?
1. there's nothing wrong with hookers. 2. It's a DYStopian society, hello.
I see the Racist Bassist is fluffing her own ego again, trying to paint herself as a respectable 'artist'. Hint, Lindsey: a respectable artist doesn't mock the victims of tragedies and rape. A respectable artist doesn't mock the victims of child sexual abuse and further humiliate them. You are not respectable. You are vile, evil trash.
Just because he wrote Molly as a woman who can kick ass in leather doesn't mean he and his books did any favors to the feminist movement.
You haven't read the book. You're
thinking of Trinity in The Matrix.
I see the 'feminist' Jessicka is hard at work on twitter promoting her racist, rape-mocking friend.
Jessicka wasn't at Lyn-Z's show?????
12:50 stop it.
12:50 PM
either was Gerard,so?
12:51 PM
NO! I can make an observation just like every other person here. I didn't bring her up.
Such a powerful statement on behalf of women. All I could think of when I read that was Ken fucking a headless, mindless barbie doll. All the woman was there for was the sex act. All that was needed was the woman's body. Riviera didn't even need lips to kiss. Just the rest of her body to do whatever he wanted to do.
Seems to me you're just finding little snippets from the book on the web to reinforce your opinion.
I see the 'feminist' Jessicka is hard at work on twitter promoting her racist, rape-mocking friend.
cheap shot. so lame.
I can disagree. I have free will. I agree with a lot of what is said here but I still like Jessicka and her views. Am I banned now?
Seems to me you're just finding little snippets from the book on the web to reinforce your opinion.
BINGO!
That's what people do here.
Personally I'm sick of reading about them here. Maybe you should concentrate on people that do matter.
Let's not start this again. Who cares. Let them all rot.
You're not banned 12:57.
1:00 PM
YES!
Jessicka is as bad as her racist rape-promoting friend and the wannabe woman-beating husband. Must be great going round that house for dinner. I wonder if Lindsey plays Panty Shot to show off her amaaaaaazzzing 'art'? I bet Jessicka loves all the racial slurs in MSI's songs. She must feel right at home with that crew of vile monsters.
Exactly who cares?
That's what people do here.
Hmmm you sound familiar.
Jessicka claims to care. She tells people she fights against that sort of thing. But when it's her friends doing it, she promotes them and tells people to back off when they get upset by it.
Her friends are allowed to call people racial slurs, threaten to hit women and mock victims of sexual abuse and assault. But anyone else? She hates them! Does that make sense? Why is she promoting these scummy people? Why does she want to spend time with the sort of people who write things like Panty Shot? Maybe because she is just like them. She is just as gross and disgusting.
Jessicka said she was bummed to miss the show. She said she was there in spirit. Promoting and supporting a racist 'in spirit'. Tells it all really...
And 1:07? How does it change anything?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-nPYvdSA9E
Jessicka's favorite song! She asks Lindsey to play it in the car when they drive to starbucks to get coffee and go to their awesome art studio to make awesome art together and congratulate each other on their total ~feminist~ awesomeness! Just don't mention all the songs Lindsey has performed about kid rape and sexual assault, and you're fine...
Jessicka is a fraud, a fake, a hypocrite. She should just admit she's defensive of them because her 'morals' are a hollow as her racist friend's skull.
If you're trying to bait people in response, I don't think it's going to work.
Not bait, just make people think twice before they try and defend her too. She's as fucked up as her friends are.
I'm not interested in giving a group of people the attention I don't think they deserve. There are people whose words are relevant and important. Time should be spend on them imo.
Then why are you here?
^spent
Time should be spent exposing the feminist Jessicka for who she really is, by exposing the gross behavior of her close circle of friends. Could you take someone who spoke out against racism seriously if they went and hung out with a bunch of white power thugs all weekend? Nope. How can you respect someone like her who speaks out for women then goes and hangs out with a person who makes money touring with a rape-promoting racist band?
I don't see how Jessicka could stand to be in the same room as the perfomer of Panty Shot, or the people who freely use racial slurs or threaten to punch women. I would have thought that was pure hell for her. Unless she's fake and the whole riot girl act was just that - an act to sell records. If she really believes what she preaches, she'll speak out, publicly and name names, against her racist bunch of associates.
I wonder if the Japanese artist at Lindsey's art show knows about the 'Fuck the tsunami' incident? I wonder what she'd think of Lindsey's 'who cares?' attitude...
I bet lots of her new 'art' friends would like to know about her racist band and songs like Panty Shot.
y
Seems to me you're just finding little snippets from the book on the web to reinforce your opinion.
yeah, if you google "william gibson feminist" that's the site that comes up. I checked to see if clueless!anon had googled, and sure enough. That anon has never read WG. They just want to be contrary.
n
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How many women in Neuromancer aren't hookers? 1?
Read the book and find out for yourself.
Then why are you here?
Because I like discussion.
Because I like the bloggers here.
And because there have been interesting conversations about different topics which made me think.
yeah, if you google "william gibson feminist" that's the site that comes up. I checked to see if clueless!anon had googled, and sure enough. That anon has never read WG. They just want to be contrary.
I don't mind if people have opposing opinions. It only bothers me when they oppose something because they dislike the person that expressed their admiration for the same thing.
b
I don't mind if people have opposing opinions. It only bothers me when they oppose something because they dislike the person that expressed their admiration for the same thing.
This. I would gladly get into a conversation about William Gibson because I like him too. But I have the deep-set feeling that this anon is someone from a certain other blog (I think I know which one but I'm torn between two) who googled William Gibson and feminism simply because a lady named Kapunua likes William Gibson. So I am not going to add to the conversation with that person.....
a
Does anyone know if Jessicka has written any feminist articles for any websites at all?
Maybe she can write about how she's best friends with a nasty racist who promotes rape. Oh wait, she already does on her twitter!
d
Re: WIlliam Gibson. Okay, I'll bite, even though, anon, I know what time it is.
If you follow William Gibson's Twitter, he's clearly got a very strong feminist leaning. Now yes, of course, saying you are a feminist and posting links about women's rights doesn't automatically make you one (case in point: the people frequently discussed here.) However, he's still about a trillion steps ahead of the crew who likes to shout about "c*nts and whores and sluts and bitches on their knees" and beating women up and punching girls in the face and making jokes about child rape. He's also a few trillion steps ahead of people who support those people.
Moving on to his books, it's clear to me, too, that you just googled those phrases. You have to look at the big picture, which is his entire body of work. Writing about women being prostitutes is not a bad thing. Sex work is not a bad thing. (The sex-work industry is pretty bad though, because it, like most things, is run by mostly men.) William Gibson's stories are either future-realistic, or dystopian. Dystopian means that the world is pretty crappy. Women being objectified is obviously a part of that crappiness. Without intruding as the author, he's writing about disapproval.
I'm sorry to cut this short; I was just getting on a role but now I have to run. More later.
^Exactly, Kapuna. And also, Gibson does not ever judge his female characters for being prostitutes. That doesn't lessen them as people. I think this is an extraordinary feat for a male author to accomplish.
There is no point trying to explain Molly to this anon. I'm more inclined to have them read the book. It might spark their synapses again.
c
Holy crap, I meant "getting on a roll" but then eight things started happening at once. Sorry! But yes. There's no judgment of his female characters but there is judgment on how they are treated. He manages this without talking down to the reader, though, or putting his own agenda into the story. He just treats women as characters in the worlds that he creates.
Are there some problems? Sure. He's never going to entirely understand what it means to be a woman, obviously. He's speaking from a place of privilege; of course perspective is going to be somewhat skewed or he's not going to always get the right picture. There's no way around that. (Side-note: JGL has written a movie that's dealing with gender roles etc. and I talked a bit about that at Hitrecord.)
But for the most part he's just writing characters, in some cases empowered characters (see: Pattern REcognition) who happen to be women. And that's the way to do it.
!!!!!
I see the 'feminist' Jessicka is hard at work on twitter promoting her racist, rape-mocking friend.
I hate to break to everybody but Jessicka isn't 12 so she doesn't listen to MSI or MCR.
So let me get this straight? Lyn-Z Way showed at Merry Karnowsky gallery. Merry is an Asian woman.
Because she showed Lyn-Z's work is she now a racist piece of shit too?
What about Tara McPherason? She showed with Lyn-Z is she now a non- feminist?
I still support Jessicka and have since I heard her bands. Sorry people this bullshit isn't going to fly.
d
Since MSI is such a shitty band, it's possible that those people have never even heard their shitty music. Or if they have it's possible they didn't understand the shitty lyrics.
Jessicka knows the songs though. And she knows all the shitty Tweets, too.
Jessicka knows the songs though.
She does?? who says?
The only person who has room to talk on this issue is Kapunua. At least she had the guts to email one of them.
The rest of us just sit here debating mostly anonymously on this blog. That so safe? What good does it do?
If you have a problem with Jessicka, Lyn-Z, Gerard or who the hell ever at least have the guts to send an email.
don't be a coward.
cont.
When the Post goes out of its way to punish women who speak up about rape, women everywhere hear and understand the message: stay in line. Be quiet. It'll be easier for you if you just lie back and take it. Here is another story that I happened to come across yesterday, just in the normal course of reading the internet.
I was, as a teenager, locked in a room with my rapist by school administrators and told, "Don't come out until you've worked out your differences." He spent the entire time threatening to kill me, my family, and my dogs, if I ever reported anything he ever did to me again. When the head counselor eventually came back to that room, I was asked if we'd managed to work things out, and I confirmed that we had.
Because I would have said anything to get the fuck out of that room.
He raped me again and again over the next three years.
Again, this is not the exception. It is the rule. If you go looking, you can find hundreds, thousands of variations on this story. I understand why people don't want to accept this truth: it's horrible. Nobody wants to think it is their mom, their sister, their friend who things like this happen to. Better and easier to think that she's lying or that she somehow deserved what she got. For women, it's a way of warding off evil. Maybe if I can figure out what she did "wrong" I can avoid her fate. Did she dress slutty? Get drunk? Go home with a stranger? Wear headphones? It is tempting to think that if you are a good girl and do everything "right," you'll be safe. The truth is that in this culture, nobody is safe.
Even so, we look for reasons to excuse the rapist, to mitigate the horror. Even in the most cut-and-dried "honest rape" cases, and even in the New York Times, the blame is shifted.
Roxane Gay, in her amazing essay The Careless Language of Sexual Violence, examines the case of an eleven-year-old girl gang raped by 18 men:
The Times article was entitled, "Vicious Assault Shakes Texas Town,” as if the victim in question was the town itself. James McKinley Jr., the article’s author, focused on how the men’s lives would be changed forever, how the town was being ripped apart, how those poor boys might never be able to return to school. There was discussion of how the eleven-year-old girl, the child, dressed like a twenty-year-old, implying that there is a realm of possibility where a woman can “ask for it” and that it’s somehow understandable that eighteen men would rape a child. There were even questions about the whereabouts of the mother, given, as we all know, that a mother must be with her child at all times or whatever ill may befall the child is clearly the mother’s fault. Strangely, there were no questions about the whereabouts of the father while this rape was taking place.
The overall tone of the article was what a shame it all was, how so many lives were affected by this one terrible event. Little addressed the girl, the child. It was an eleven-year-old girl whose body was ripped apart, not a town. It was an eleven-year-old girl whose life was ripped apart, not the lives of the men who raped her. It is difficult for me to make sense of how anyone could lose sight of that and yet it isn’t.
cont.
These little things, these seemingly unimportant things like tone and word choice, like hate rags publishing pictures of rape victims, like all of the tiny ways that we, every day, as culture, signal to potential rapists to go ahead, it's not so bad, she probably wants it anyway, wink wink. That is rape culture. There's no neutral ground. You are either fighting hard against it—speaking up to defend rape victims, not laughing at rape jokes, refusing to accept the excuses people make for rapists—or you are part of it. Silence abets rapists. And THAT is why I will always take the side of the person making a rape accusation, and why you should too. When the playing field is level, I will wait to be vocal. I'll listen to both sides, or just stay out of it altogether. But in a world where trying to bring your rapist to justice puts you in line for something that might be more difficult to endure than the rape itself, victims need all the support they can get.
Jessicka knows the songs though.
She does?? who says?
Yes, she does.
In other news, I got the guts to finally stand up to this one hideous, sexist, godawful guy I have to deal with. He was saying some truly hideous things about women. I can't even really repeat some of it. It was along the lines of something you might hear in an MSI song, honestly. That exact kind of talk, like violent, sexualized stuff about women.
(And I know certain people still lurk here, so I'm not going to repeat where this was happening or anything.)
I was really afraid to stand up to him. He's in my social circle and a lot of my close friends like him, think he's funny, etc. I knew I was going to lose friends over it, because I knew I was going to be told to "just shut up and take a joke" and such. I knew I was going to be told "Come on, it's not really an attack against women because it's just meant to be funny / I said it around a few friends / I was pissed off / I had something to prove."
I was told that, and worse. I was called ridiculous names. And I did lose some friends. I feel really sad about the whole thing, because I haven't seen him since then and I know I stand to lose more friends.
But I couldn't stand it for another minute, and after all of it, I'm still relieved that I said something.
I'm not calling you a liar kapunua but I seriously doubt Jessicka knows the lyrics to MSI or MCR songs.
Until I see proof, I don't buy it. sorry.
You emailed with her. Clearly if she deeply offended you, we would have heard more about it here.
I refuse to compare Lyn-Z Way to Jessicka. Yes, they are friends but they are different people.
Is Mark Ryden a racist too now because he knows them?
good grief.
But I couldn't stand it for another minute, and after all of it, I'm still relieved that I said something.
I admire this. but it did take you some time to do it. And while you were still around those people did it then make you a bad person? I say no.
fart
f
I'm not calling you a liar kapunua but I seriously doubt Jessicka knows the lyrics to MSI or MCR songs.
Well seeing as I quoted them to her...
I admire this. but it did take you some time to do it. And while you were still around those people did it then make you a bad person? I say no.
I felt like a bad person every time I didn't open my mouth. And while I've known the person for a few years, on and off, it was only very recently that he became a permanent fixture, and also recently that it started to get MSI-level bad. I always knew he was like that on the inside, but the hate-spreading and straight up violent misogyny (at least in front of me) were relatively new.
It costs, standing up and saying something. It cost me my job once, and it cost me some friends and other things dear to me this time.
But it was costing me a hell of a lot more sitting there and taking it. Not only costing me, but costing everyone who came in contact with him. And it still is, because he basically told me to STFU and stop being such a bitch, so he really didn't actually learn anything, or change. And he never will. But I still had to say it, and I'm glad that I did, anon.
Another thing is that even before I said anything, I would never have considered him a friend. I wouldn't have defended his words or actions, and I sure wouldn't have promoted them.
The rest of us just sit here debating mostly anonymously on this blog. That so safe? What good does it do?
Um no, As far as I can tell it's only one person that does. I personally am not interested in any of these people and am tired of reading about them after more than one post.
If you have a problem with Jessicka, Lyn-Z, Gerard or who the hell ever at least have the guts to send an email
What for? I don't think they give a damn what others think.
.
y
Hiya guys, how are you all?
As far as death penalty for rapists, shoot, I'd carry that one out myself. Especially if children were involved.
I agree K, I think for our society to be classed as civilised there's got to be certain things that we say we cannot tolerate and the death penalty has got to be used in those cases. If we don't, we get to a stage where these things happen so often due to lack of punishment that people take it as read that it happens frequently and it almost becomes the norm. We can't let things get that way.
Anonymous said...
Hi Miss T! Good to see you!
Hiya Anon sweetie, how are you doing? Great to see you too. Is it as cold where you are as it is here? Are nipples supposed to be blue hee hee?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE COMMENTS?
a
That sounds very sore Miss T.
a
The hardest thing in the world is to persuade a straight male audience to identify with a woman character. It's easier for women because we were brought up identifying with male characters in literature. It's hard for straight boys to identify with Juliet or Wendy in Peter Pan, whereas girls identify with Romeo and with Peter Pan…
-- Meryl Streep
Discussion?
hj
vnp
Hiya Misty! ^_^ Sorry about your nips there. O_O
Re: Meryl Streep's quote. Good point. There are a lot of characters by men and for men (it's a patriarchy.) Whereas quite a few popular female characters are stereotyped by what they think we are (or should be.)
Another part of that is just ingrained misogyny. It's okay for a woman to be considered "one of the guys" because men don't find anything shameful about being men (and they shouldn't.) But if a man is considered "one of the girls" (or if he identifies strongly with women,) then he's labeled "a sissy" and worse. Because it is considered shameful to be a woman.
I don't think it's about shame Kapunua, I think it's more to do with the perception of weakness, that is being a male should equate to being strong and being in control. I believe this the the default thinking for a great deal of the male population, (some females included) though there are men who are intelligent and thoughtful enough to consciously challenge this mindset knowing it's premise is illogical.
^this is the
a
I agree with that - it is about that perceived power. But more, when men are perceived as weak (like certain people's idea of a woman) they are shamed for that.
I think women need to make a conscious effort to raise their sons differently. I don't think it's enough to raise your daughters to be strong and competent. You also have to raise your sons to see girls and women as having value beyond how they look or as sex objects.
d
I agree. If I should have a daughter, I would raise her to be happy and proud of whoever she is, to make her own choices (carefully,) and to know that she could to anything--ANYthing--if it's what she really wanted.
I think women need to make a conscious effort to raise their sons differently. I don't think it's enough to raise your daughters to be strong and competent. You also have to raise your sons to see girls and women as having value beyond how they look or as sex objects
I believe much of this thinking is unconscious: children observe how their parents interact with each other and their roles within the family. The pattern is set there imo.
I think what Meryl Streep said is true, but I do see this changing. I knew boys who were really into Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and not just because she was "hot". They thought she was a great character. I think the more guys are exposed to strong female characters the better things will get.
I don't think it's necessarily about being a "strong" character I mean that can be a trap in itself and leads to an either or stereotype. I think it has more to do with breaking out of expectations and rigid definitions. The same goes for male characters, they need to show more possibilities, more vulnerability.
a
I agree with all of the above. And Buffy was a great character! Human, flawed, strong, vulnerable, kick-ass, in control, out of control, and above all, a hero.
I love Meryl Streep. I used to think she was overrated until I saw her in Angels in America. She was amazing, and so was every other actor in it.
Anyone who hasn't seen AIA, go out and get it immediately!
I think it depends on your definition of "strong", 6:34. To me a strong character is one that is well-written and rounded as opposed to the one-dimensional females that used to dominate films and television. A character can be physically and emotionally strong, but be a "weak" character if he/she is poorly written, and vice versa.
Buffy was a great character! Human, flawed, strong, vulnerable, kick-ass, in control, out of control, and above all, a hero.
This.
Kickstarter is actually interesting!
I like being a woman, even in a man's world. After all, men can't wear dresses, but we can wear the pants.
Whitney Houston
I'm every woman
It's all in me
Anything you want done baby
I do it naturally
R.I.P. Whitney Houston
Beautiful, talented, classy, trashy, strong, weak, independent and dependent, needing what every person needs. Flawed. Human.
And Jessicka just keeps on promoting her racist friend. I wonder what Emilie Autumn thinks of your promotion of a misogynist racist? Why don't you just try and downplay your friend's gross behavior one more time.
RIP Whitney Houston.
A
Jessicka and Emilie Autumn are friends. Seems Jessicka is friends with a lot of people including Kelly Osbourne and Fairuza Balk. Are they alll racists too? By your logic they all agouls be if they arr friebds with her. Also she is promoting Matthew Bone the artist a person of color? What gives?
But these things never get mentioned here.
Honestly? I get sick of hearing about Jessicka. I'm not a fan. Never was. I don't know why you continue to give her so much attention. Maybe that's the reason she keeps promoting Lindsey, because it keeps her in the limelight somewhat?
d
We all know racists and misogynists. We all have those people in our lives - that's unavoidable because it's the world we live in. THEY are unavoidable. We have to work with them, talk to them, and be civil with them if we're to get by. And when it comes to family, there's just no escape.
Sometimes our friends show their privilege. If we're able to, we talk to them about it. Over and over and over again. Sometimes over the years, they can change. I've seen it happen.
But other times they don't change, and then, if they're the kind of friend you see a lot, sometimes it's better to cut 'em loose. But we aren't "racist by association."
What you don't do--if you're an actual feminist/ally of people of other races--is promote their racist / misogynistic works. If you know for a fact that they are publicly racist, sexist, making rape jokes, calling people n*gger and f*ggot etc. then you don't endorse them. Once you do that, then yes. You are racist/misogynist by association.
End of. I can't even think of how else to put it.
I guess we'll see how much Jessicka endorses Lindsey and her racism when she attends the MSI show booked for Los Angeles soon. She's not going to stand up her BFF at the moment of her 'comeback' to her racist, rape-promoting hate band, is she? After all, Jessicka's never had an issue with looking like a complete and total hypocrite...
If she shows up to that gig, I think everyone can write her off as a 'femiist'. What feminist would want to go listen to songs about girls being sexually abused or assaulted, and pedos wanting to rape kids?
Jessicka will be there. She can't drop out without Lindsey and Gerard taking offense and ditching her.
But these things never get mentioned here.
They're overwritten by the fact that she has been shown evidence that her friend is a racist, sexist, misogynist who promotes sexual violence against women and mocks the sexual abuse of children. Yet she keeps being her very close friend, and continues to promote and support her as an artist. Se should kick Lindsey to the kerb for that crap, not forgive her for it, or pretend it doesn't exist.
I find it strange and disappointing that the people here have to resort to using fictional characters as examples of strong and powerful women. Fictional characters written by men. Fictional characters who play into the male fantasy.
Buffy couldn't go 5 minutes without a boyfriend. Lisbeth wouldn't have become kickass, strong Lisbeth if she hadn't been gang raped at 15 years old. Molly is a cyborg, meat puppet.
Buffy? Lisbeth? Molly? Not real. Not one of them. Not one of them would be the strong woman they are if not for the men around them. The men who dated, raped, paid for, and shaped them.
Buffy, Lisbeth, and Molly should no more be held up as examples to women than Superman, Lancelot and Prince Charming should be held as examples to men.
They. Are. Not. Real. People.
Jessika Adams is real. A strong, vulnerable, talented, kick ass, no holds barred, flawed woman. Real. A feminist. A real person.
A real feminist who's best friends with someone who thinks promoting rape is fine? And who ignores that fact and gets defensive about it when she's made aware of it?
Yeah right. She's a shallow, fame-hungry coward.
They. Are. Not. Real. People.
The conversation was about FICTIONAL female characters written by men, and how these inform male perceptions about women. Please read the entire conversation before you bulldoze in with your defensive Jessicka pandering.
If Jessicka is such a feminist and strong women, why hasn't she called out Panty Shot?
And why does she think her best friend's husband threatening to hit women is fine? Because if she actually cared about women's rights she would have publicly addressed and condemned that tweet, and her friend's gross songs. Because her silence and whitewashing of it sends a very dangerous message to the thousands of young girls who follow and look up to her because of who she is friends with. They think being threatend by men is fine. They think rape is no big issue. They think Lindsey is a role model for being a racist.
What you don't do--if you're an actual feminist/ally of people of other races--is promote their racist / misogynistic works. If you know for a fact that they are publicly racist, sexist, making rape jokes, calling people n*gger and f*ggot etc. then you don't endorse them. Once you do that, then yes. You are racist/misogynist by association.
This is perfect.
I find it strange and disappointing that the people here have to resort to using fictional characters as examples of strong and powerful women.
Boy, did you miss the point. We were not talking about real people. We were talking about fictional characters, as we were responding to the Meryl Streep quote.
No, Buffy, Lisbeth, and Molly are not real. But they are female characters who were written by men as people, rather than the stereotypical female damsels in distress that you usually get from male authors. And of course they were flawed, and of course their environment shaped them. That's what made them such well-written characters. That is what the discussion was about.
I actually loved that Buffy "couldn't go five minutes without a boyfriend" in the first several seasons of the show. Why? Because I've known so many girls just like that. The fact that Buffy had been your typical privileged, pretty, "valley girl" before coming into her slayer powers was one of the things that made her so interesting -- her previous and current lives were always in conflict with one another. And besides, she was what, sixteen when the show first started?
But the most amazing thing about Buffy was that by the time the show ended, the last thing on her mind was a boyfriend. She had grown from a high school girl into an independent woman.
Nobody is holding Buffy up to be an actual role model for young girls. That would be ridiculous because "slayers" don't exist, any more than vampires do. But as a fictional character, Buffy kicked ass.
Jessicka Addams is real. A strong, vulnerable, talented, kick ass, no holds barred, flawed woman. Real. A feminist. A real person.
She is! Buffy isn't a real person. Jessicka is.
So what if she's friends with Lyn-Z way ? That makes no difference for all the good she does in the world and how she tries to empower young women of all sizes and ethnic backgrounds. I have seen no evidence of her being a racist or a bad person.
She never brings up MCR or MSI ever. Because to her as an artist and as an adult they do not matter. They matter to 12 year old and disgruntled ex- fans like people here.
5 year old panty shot was written how long ago? By jimmy Urine before Lyn-z was in MSI. I say as a thinking adult she does not want to give it any public attention.
You can all go on and on with your assumptions about this woman but I have seen her do much more good than bad.
Jessicka Addams is real. A strong, vulnerable, talented, kick ass, no holds barred, flawed woman. Real. A feminist. A real person.
She is! Buffy isn't a real person. Jessicka is.
So what if she's friends with Lyn-Z way ? That makes no difference for all the good she does in the world and how she tries to empower young women of all sizes and ethnic backgrounds. I have seen no evidence of her being a racist or a bad person.
She never brings up MCR or MSI ever. Because to her as an artist and as an adult they do not matter. They matter to 12 year old and disgruntled ex- fans like people here.
5 year old panty shot was written how long ago? By jimmy Urine before Lyn-z was in MSI. I say as a thinking adult she does not want to give it any public attention.
You can all go on and on with your assumptions about this woman but I have seen her do much more good than bad.
* 12 year olds
k
Kapunua, I have to ask. So not to put words in your mouth. Did you like your correspondence with Jessicka? Did she seem like a bad person or a racist to you?
So if she ges to the upcoming MSI show, she'll still be 'not giving them any attention' will she? And it doesn't matter who wrote the gross song; Lindsey has performed it PLENTY of times. So she clearly has no issue with it.
She may not have said or done racist, rape-promoting things, but she is close friends with people who HAVE, and she continues to promote and defend them when they come under fire for it. That undermines any good she may be doing elsewhere because she chooses to stay silent and let all her fans think her friend's behaviour is fine.
*goes
She may not have said or done racist, rape-promoting things, but she is close friends with people who HAVE, and she continues to promote and defend them when they come under fire for it. That undermines any good she may be doing elsewhere because she chooses to stay silent and let all her fans think her friend's behaviour is fine.
But that's just it. We have gone around in circles about this issue. None of you have any idea if she has stayed silent she just may not broadcast her conversations about such things on twitter or a blog. What go would that do?
It silly really. Whether we like it or not Lyn-zWay has an art career. Jessicka supports her because she too is an artist. These facts do not make Jessicka racist.
Go . I meant to type what good would that do?
I just do not understand why Jessicka is such a hot topic around here. So many of you love to hate her. It's unreal.
Jessicka's art was on Anthony Bourdain's show is he now a racist?
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